German authorities arrested 25 suspected members of Reichsbürger, an extremist organization influenced by QAnon conspiracy theories that espouses a doctrine similar to that of far-right groups in the U.S, in an alleged plot to overthrow the government. What do you think? Read more…
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Most Controversial Celebrity Pregnancy Reveals
Here are the most dramatic, crazy, and unexpected ways that celebrities have announced they have a baby currently living inside them. Read more…
Family Scandalized After Grandmother Leaves Hot, Young Caretaker Her Cherished Cobbler Recipe
GREENWICH, CT—Bursting into shouts of opposition as an attorney read aloud her will, members of the local Douvry family were reportedly scandalized Friday upon discovering their recently deceased grandmother, Harriet Douvry, had left her hot, young caretaker her cherished apple cobbler recipe. “This is obscene!… Read more…
Easy-Going Company Has World Cup On During Layoffs
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God Kicking Self For Not Coming Up With Hentai
THE HEAVENS—The Lord God Almighty, He Who Commanded Light to Shine out of Darkness, told reporters Friday he was still kicking Himself for not coming up with hentai on His own, saying the Japanese form of animated pornography represented everything He had hoped to capture in creation. “In all My divine work, My… Read more…
Trump Organization Found Guilty On All Counts Of Tax Fraud
Donald Trump’s real estate company has been found guilty on all 17 charges of tax fraud and other crimes related to a 15-year-long criminal scheme to defraud tax authorities. What do you think? Read more…
Americans React To Brittney Griner Returning Home From Russia
WNBA star Brittney Griner, who had been imprisoned for months in Russia for transporting cannabis vape cartridges, was released in a prisoner swap. The Onion asked Americans what they thought about the basketball player securing her freedom and returning home. Read more…
Onion Sports’ NFL Week 14 Picks
Onion Sports shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in the NFL’s week 14 games. Read more…
‘The Onion’ Has Accidentally Locked Ourselves Out Of Our Office In Solidarity With Striking ‘New York Times’ Workers
Today, reporters and editors of The New York Times began a one-day strike, as negotiations between their union and management failed to reach an agreement. Here at America’s Finest News Source, we are committed to supporting our fellow journalists, and so The Onion has boldly and inadvertently locked ourselves out of… Read more…
Elon Musk Worried He Won’t Have Enough Twitter Employees Left To Fire On Christmas Eve
SAN FRANCISCO—Expressing concern that he might have totally ruined the holiday season, Elon Musk reportedly worried Thursday that he wouldn’t have enough Twitter employees left to fire on Christmas Eve. “Gosh, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to parcel them out long enough to enjoy destroying a few of their lives on… Read… Continue reading Elon Musk Worried He Won’t Have Enough Twitter Employees Left To Fire On Christmas Eve